If You Dont Like Being Hurt, Please Dont Stay
by JadeWerewolf
Summary: Harry and Draco are in love but a drastic change in Draco over Christmas break may result in the death of one.
1. Things Are So Complicated

If You Don't Like Being Hurt Please Don't Stay  
  
Chapter One: Things Are So Complicated  
  
Draco's hand moved unsteadily as he picked out the powder and put it on a spoon. I need it now! He thought. He poured some water onto it and began to heat it up. Then carefully, so he would not to spill it, he set it on the table. He took his needle and as fast as he could, injected the heroin into his vein. He moaned a little in euphoria. Sometimes, it felt useless to Draco. There was never anyone that he wanted to shoot up with anymore. And he wasn't sure that he'd keep doing it, if he wasn't already addicted. He wanted to ask Harry Potter to get high with him. But what would Harry think of him then? He already hated him. And Draco hated himself for loving him.  
  
It had happened in their 3rd year, but he had kept it a secret. His father would surely whip him for it. And his mother... God knows what she would do. And Draco couldn't tell Harry because Harry hated him.  
  
Things are so complicated.  
  
Draco sighed. He wished he had someone to talk to. To tell that he loved 'Perfect Potter' more than anything. Then Draco realized that he didn't have enough heroin for another hit. He cursed his father under his breath for giving him any in the first place. That had been two years ago. But he already tried pot. And was drinking. His father seemed to think it best to give him the "best drugs", if Draco was going to use them. And now one day, it's probably going to kill him.   
  
Draco's father Lucius, was a weak man. And Draco knew this. With one wrong word or move, Lucius would flog the life out of him. Draco had scars and gashes all over his back, all his life, from where he had been beaten with a belt. Lucius was a drunk. And when he got drunk and high, he came to Draco. It was their little secret when Draco had been a child, and now it was just something that happened that he was used to. Yes, it was rape, but Draco, being raised around it, thought it was something all fathers did to their sons. Even so, Draco hated his father.  
  
His mother, Narcissa (Black was her maiden name), was just as bad, when it came to alcohol. But when Draco was being beat and raped by his father, his mother locked herself up in her room. And drank. And cried. And passed out. There isn't much else to say about his mother. But Draco hated her, too.  
  
When Draco was let down from heroin, a sensation he enjoyed just as much as the high, he looked for some cocaine. His father had a stash of coke in his room but that was risky. Even at three o'clock in the morning, when both of his parents are most likely passed out, he had no idea if there was some kind of charm on the cocaine. Draco didn't dare touch it but decided on marijuana instead. To tell the truth, no one really knew how Draco got drugs when he was Hogwarts. His father didn't send him any. "It's not worth getting arrested." Lucius had said. But Draco managed to get them anyway. Often confusing his father.  
  
Then, when Draco had finished his joint, he reached for a razor blade. "I hate you!" He muttered under his breath, as he sliced open the skin on his wrist. "I hate you, Dad! I hate you, Mom! I hate you! I hate Potter! And I hate myself!" He repeated over and over. Each time cutting a little deeper. Until, he blacked out.   
  
The next day, Draco was packing his things to go back to school. He was entering his 5th year. He made sure to bewitch all of his drugs to look like harmless things. his new stash of heroin turned into a bottle of ink and his needles, quills. And his cocaine was a bottle of ink, and his joints and cigarettes, quills as well. I'll get to see Harry, soon. Draco thought. But as he reached for the handle on the door, the doorknob turned. In stepped his father. Draco's eyes bulged. "Your bug-eyed, Draco." Lucius said, coolly. "Now sit down on the bed. And take your shirt off." Draco did as he was told and nervously looked at the whip in his father's hand. He had forgotten his annual beating. Before he left for he was beaten so badly by his father, that he could hardly walk. "This is for all of those misdemeanors you make at that damn school, boy!" his father yelled. And then, he walked out. Draco felt the blood running down his back. And the searing pain. But after all, he thought, who am I to complain? Didn't father say that all children are beat? Am I just weak because I feel the pain of it? And, ashamed of himself, Draco put his shirt back on, grabbed his things, and went outside where his parents where ready to take him to Platform Nine and Three-Quarters. 


	2. The Headquarter's of the Order

Chapter Two: The Head Quarter's of the Order and Stevie  
  
Harry hated summer holidays. He was cooped up in his room at Number 4, Privet Drive, with his abusive cousin and uncle. Harry lay on his bed. He was massively tired and hung over. He couldn't find a comfortable position because of all the bruises all over him, from the last time Dudley decided to beat him up. The fact that he i could /i curse him, didn't stop Dudley anymore. Dudley seemed to know that he'd be expelled from Hogwarts. And so did Uncle Vernon. Slowly, and carefully, so as not to wake the Dursely's, he crept downstairs and flung open the door to the medicine cabinet. "Where is it?" he asked aloud. Then he saw what he wanted. First of all, he wanted aspirin. And second of all, he wanted his cousin's "medicine". They were really ecstasy. And as much as Harry hated drugs, the past few days had been too much to take, so he got high to block it out.  
  
Harry popped a pill in his mouth and grabbed three for later. He tip-toed back up the stairs, intending to make it to the roof before the E kicked in. He grabbed a blanket and some books, parchment, and quills. It wasn't very late and Harry realized this, so he took things to occupy him, in case he didn't have enough pills.   
  
As the high kicked in, Harry noticed something across the sky. It looked like a bunch of geese. But it seemed to be coming closer, and Harry realized they were too big too be geese. Then he thought, i I'm just seeing things. It's the E. Not my eyes. /i Until he saw that they were on brooms. "Wizards!" Harry said and laughed. Then, Lupin, the real Mad-Eye Moody, two wizards he didn't know and two witches he didn't know either, entered his house. Harry was confused. So, he stepped inside and went down to the kitchen. And before he knew it, Harry was on his broom, being taken out of the Dursely house. He didn't remember much, after that.  
  
He woke in a bed in a strange house. Ron was there looking over him. "Bloody hell! Harry, are you okay?" he asked. "Yeah, I think so. Where are we?" he replied.  
  
"The headquarters of the Order of Phoenix."  
  
"Oh. Um...what's that?"  
  
Ron rolled his eyes. "The Order that fights Who-Know-Who. And the Ministry now...Mum's got breakfast. Wanna go?"  
  
"Yeah." said Harry rolling over, "Yeah. Let's go."  
  
Harry and Ron walked downstairs. "Um, Ron?" Harry asked. "Yeah?" he replied.   
  
"Well, what happened last night?"  
  
"I dunno. You'll have to ask Lupin. He was there."  
  
Harry nodded and noticed that Lupin was at the table. And so were the two witches he didn't know. "Good morning, Harry!" One announced happily. "Hi," said Harry. The witch, he noticed, had spiky pink hair. The other had long black hair, with purple streaks, and eyes that were startlingly similar in colour and shape to Harry's. Lupin looked at her and then looked away when she caught his gaze.  
  
"How are you, Harry?" Lupin asked.   
  
"I have a head-ache. And I'm a little confused, but I guess I'm fine." Harry replied.   
  
"Why are you confused?"  
  
"I don't really know what happened. Or where I am or how I got here."  
  
Then the pink-haired witch spoke, "Well, ecstasy'll do that to you." she winked at him.   
  
"Well," Lupin began, "Last night we came and brought you here. That's about it."  
  
"Oh." Harry said.  
  
"But, we can save details for later. You need to meet someone." Lupin pointed at the witch who resembled Harry. "This," he said, "is Stevie Potter. She's your dad's sister." Harry's jaw dropped. He didn't know he had any other relatives. And she seemed just as nervous as he did. "So...so, you're my aunt?" Harry said, rather lamely.  
  
"Yup, that's me!" she said with a smile. And that seemed to make them both more comfortable.  
  
"We'll just go," Lupin said and gathered Ron out of the room.  
  
His conversation with Stevie was very pleasant and he realized that she and the other witch, Tonks, were very cool. Before they left the table Stevie said, "Tomorrow, Sirius and I are going to go with you to King's Cross. Have a nice day and I'll see you."  
  
Harry had a long conversation with Sirius, later. Sirius was awfully glad to see him again. And then, they both retired. It seemed like five minutes and then he was at King's Cross, saying goodbye to everyone. "Keep in touch, Harry!" Stevie yelled, and pat Sirius on the head and let him off his leash. 


	3. This Is What Want

Chapter 3: This Is What I Want  
  
Draco caught a glimpse of Harry as he boarded the scarlet train. i Maybe, I should talk to him? /i he thought. And then he felt like he needed a hit. So, he made his way to the first empty compartment he saw and took out a needle. Then, in case he did talk to Harry, he stopped. And, quite suddenly, he saw Harry. Not Harry surrounded by his henchmen. But just by himself. He started to walk into Draco's compartment. His heart was beating at top speed now.  
  
"Mind if I join you?" Harry asked.  
  
"I don't care, Potter!" Draco said. Why couldn't he be nicer?  
  
Harry sat down and put his stuff away. "So, um, did you have a nice summer?" he asked.  
  
"Why do you care?!" Draco sneered. Still not being nice.  
  
"I don't know. I was just making conversation."   
  
"Well, for your information, Potter, I did have a wonderful summer. With my iwizarding family/i!"  
  
"Oh." Harry said. Draco noticed he was looking at the door, longingly, as if to leave.  
  
"How was your summer?" Draco asked, cautiously.  
  
Harry seemed surprised but said, "It was fine." And smiled. Draco tried to smile back. But couldn't. So he reached for a magazine but the bruises from heroin and his father's beating showed on his arms. Harry looked at them, shocked, for a moment. Then, Draco realized what he had done, and pulled his arm back. His pale face was now glowing red.  
  
"What happened there?" Harry asked. He really did look concerned.  
  
"Why do you care? It's none of your business! And why are you here, Potter?" he suddenly demanded.  
  
"I don't know." Harry said, "I'll just leave then?" His eyes looked into Draco's and then Draco shifted his gaze. "All right, then." Harry said, "I'll see you at school." He walked out, leaving Draco alone. i I could have been nicer! /i he thought to himself. But it didn't matter now. It was too late. And Harry had had a glimpse of the little boy inside him. Couldn't really fix that could he? So he decided to snort some cocaine and then sleep the rest of the trip.  
  
When they arrived at Hogwarts, he met up with Crabbe and Goyle. He truly hated those two oafs right then. But sat with them through the feast anyway. He didn't touch his food really. But he did stare at Harry. Who laughed and talked like nothing had happened between them. Of course Draco had read the rumors in the Daily Prophet. Everyone had. But it didn't matter to him. It seemed to matter to the Gryffindors though. Everyone was moving away from Harry. And the thing is, Draco knew that He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named was back. So, Harry wasn't lying for more fame. Sometimes, Draco hated him for his fame. His only fame was his family had been in Slytherin all its generations and of course, the Malfoy name. One of the closest servants of the Dark Lord. He was happy when the feast ended.  
  
He decided to walk alone to the Dormitory. Then someone came running up along side him. "WAIT!" he yelled. The person was Harry.  
  
"What do want, Potter?" Draco spat, "Shouldn't you be with all your fans?"  
  
"Shut up, Malfoy!" he pulled him behind a suit or armor, "I didn't come here to fight with you."  
  
"Then why did you come?"  
  
"Because I wanted to know what's on your arms. And where you got you black eye. And why I think you have bruises all over!"  
  
Draco looked at him, "Why do you care, Potter-"  
  
"I have a name you know! It's Harry."  
  
"Fine, Harry, why do you care about me? Shouldn't you and all your fans be happy that Draco's hurt. 'Maybe he'll end up dead!'" Draco shouted.  
  
"I don't want that." Harry said, quietly, after a pause.  
  
"Then what do you want?! I know what I want." Draco pushed him up against the wall and put his face rather close to Harry's. "This is what I want." He said, softly and kissed him. To his surprise, Harry kissed him back. Draco felt that all his dreams were coming true. "This is what I want, too." Harry murmured.  
  
"Wait," said Draco and he stopped kissing him and playfully teasing his erection. "Meet me somewhere, anywhere, tonight! Some empty class room. The one on the sixth floor, room 607! Alright?" He seemed in a hurry.  
  
"All right!" Harry said and kissed him and Draco sprinted off. Then yelled back, "Midnight!" He wasn't sure if Harry had heard him or not. But he hoped he had. And then, when he had made it into the Common Room, Draco was suddenly afraid of what he had just asked of Harry. Maybe he could pretend it didn't happen and Harry had dreamed it all. Distraught, Draco, went to bed and decided not to go. He shot up twice before sleeping though. 


	4. Same Time, Same Place

Chapter Four: Same Time, Same Place  
  
Harry looked at his watch. It was past midnight by an hour. He was going to leave soon. Maybe he had dreamed the entire thing. Maybe he had wanted it so bad that he had made it happen in his head. But those lips... they had felt so real. Harry touched his lips and remembered. It couldn't have been a dream. He suddenly wished he had someone to talk too. Not Ron. Or Hermione. They would both be shocked beyond words and probably never talk to him again.  
  
Harry pictured Hermione's reaction. "But he called me a mudblood, Harry! He hates us all! You know what he says to Ron about being a Weasley! His family is the closest to V-Voldemort! You can't love him! Your his enemy!" Yes, Hermione would probably say something like that.  
  
Then Harry pictured Ron's reaction. First, his ears would turn red. And so would his face. And then his eyebrows would disappear into his hair. He's mutter something like, "Bloody gone mad!" And walk away and then probably ignore Harry and not catch his eye for as long as possible. No, he couldn't tell either of them.  
  
There was always Dean or Seamus. Certainly not Neville. Neville's parents had been tortured by Lucius Malfoy. And Dean would probably say something stupid like, "Well, Harry, the heart wants what the heart wants." And Seamus would think he was insane, with a similar reaction like Ron's.  
  
He concluded that he couldn't tell anyone. But then a thought came into his head. Would Stevie be cool with it? She did, after all, have a relationship with Tonks. Maybe she wouldn't mind. But Harry pushed that out of his mind. Too soon. He didn't know her well enough to share something that personal yet. Then he thought of Sirius. It was a possibility but he got rid of that too. But didn't Sirius say he would always love Harry, no matter what he did? Harry sighed and look at his watch. Half past one. He jumped down from the desk and went back to the Gryffindor dormitory. Maybe he really had dreamed of Draco.  
  
Harry was very confused as he pulled the covers over him.\  
  
The next day, Harry went to breakfast feeling very bad. He saw Draco, who didn't even look at him. And Hermione, of course, guessed that there was something wrong. and Ron noticed too. She tried to find the problem though, "Harry are you alright?" she asked.  
  
"F.ine, why?" he lied.  
  
"You seem a bit off colour, mate." Ron stated.  
  
"No, I'm fine." Harry replied.  
  
"Your not sick, are you?" Hermione said.  
  
"I'm fine, alright!" Harry said, irritably.   
  
"Oh, God!" Ron moaned.   
  
"What?" asked Harry.  
  
"We've got double Potions with Slytherin, Divination and then Defense Against the Dark Arts with that Umbridge woman!" he replied.  
  
"Wonderful. Sounds like a really smashing day." Harry said, sarcastically. Then the bell rang and they left the Great Hall.  
  
Harry and Ron walked down the corridor to the dungeons. And Harry noticed the suit of armor that he had pushed Draco behind. And then he saw it. "Wait." Harry said and Ron stopped. "What is it?" he asked. Harry knelt down and picked up a ring. It had a snake twisting around an M.   
  
"It's a ring."  
  
"I know that crest! It means Malfoy!" Ron said, aghast.  
  
"Well, I'll have to give it back to him." Harry said. That proves it, he thought, It did happen. I'm not crazy.  
  
In potions, Snape was as evil as ever. He paired Harry and Draco, as he, Harry, had been counting on.  
  
"You dropped this last night." Harry said to him and gave the ring to Draco. He did not meet his eye.  
  
"Thanks, Potter." Draco sneered.  
  
"Don't call me that." Harry snapped.  
  
"And why not?"  
  
"You know perfectly well why. Where were you last night?"  
  
Draco's attitude changed completely. "I was... I'm sorry."  
  
"It's alright. But where were you and why didn't you come? I waited until one-thirty."  
  
"I was scared, alright! Are you happy, Harry!" Draco's voice got louder.  
  
"No," said Harry, "I wanted you to be there. You think I wasn't scared? Everything I had dreamed of since 3rd year coming true. And then you don't show up. And I feel lost, confused, sad, and afraid but anything but happy."  
  
"I'm sorry." Draco blushed scarlet under his white skin.  
  
"I already said it's perfectly alright."   
  
"Look, if I...if I ask you to meet me again, would you come?"  
  
"Yes." Harry was relieved that he didn't have to ask him.  
  
"Alright. Same place, same time, tonight?"  
  
"Sounds good." Harry's spirit's were lifted. And even Snape giving him a zero because he had forgot an ingredient, didn't get him down. He didn't mind the huge amount of homework for once. Divination was as boring as ever. Harry didn't know why he and Ron were still taking it. But it was the time when he got to Defense Against the Dark Arts, that his happiness seemed to float away.  
  
"Oh God!" Ron snarled after the lesson, "I think she's worse than Snape!"  
  
"I agree." said Hermione, "She obliviously has no idea how to teach a class. No wands!" she snorted.   
  
They walked to the Great Hall for dinner, Ron and Hermione talking about Umbridge. Harry caught Draco's eye. And followed his signals. After dinner, they met outside.   
  
"What's going on?" asked Harry.  
  
"I didn't want to wait." Draco said with a laugh.  
  
"We could go now?"   
  
"Alright." replied his partner after a pause. 


	5. Draco's Dream

Chapter Five: Draco's Dream  
  
We could go now? Harry's words rang through Draco's mind. I get to have him now! He thought, eagerly, I get to hold him and kiss him! They proceeded to the sixth floor and quietly stole into the room. When they had been in the empty room for no more or less than three seconds, Draco grabbed Harry and pushed him against the wall again. This time he wasted no seconds in talking, or breathing for that matter. All Draco knew was that when he put his lips to Harry's and his tongue in Harry's mouth, he was filled with a sweet bliss that melted him and seeped through every vein. It was sweeter than heroin. But more painful than cutting. It hit him harder than junk did, and coursed faster through his veins. It affected his brain quicker than cocaine. And made him higher than ecstasy or pot could take him.  
  
Trying to be as gentle as he could, but needing Harry so badly his hands were shaking, Draco removed Harry's clothing as Harry removed his. When both were naked, Draco laid down their robes and lowered Harry's shaking body to the floor.   
  
"The world has changed because you are made of ivory and gold. The curves of your lips rewrite history." Draco quoted from a movie he had seen, that had, in some mysterious way, made him think of Harry. A man with bleach blonde hair and ice blue eyes, and a man with dark hair and gorgeous features in love. Yes, it seemed quite right to him.  
  
Harry lay on his side and Draco kissed his back, and all the way down his spine. He rolled Harry over and put his lips on his burning erection. The sweet juices of Harry's love flowed into his mouth and he moaned in pleasure. Draco moved on top of him and stared into Harry's bottle green eyes. All time had stopped to him. He was no longer conscious of anything... anything but his lover's eyes and movement beneath him.  
  
Over the next few days, Draco and Harry relished the time they had together. Every Potions class was more bearable. And even Care of Magical Creatures, without Hagrid but with the Slytherins, was better. At night they would meet in empty classrooms or bathrooms. Considering that Draco was a prefect, it was often the prefect's bathroom that they used. Draco was surprised by the thoughtful things his lover often did for him. For instance, on his birthday, Harry had made a magnificent cake, filled with Honeydukes sweets. And out-of-the-blue, he would surprise him with things from the Pleasure Box in Hogsmeade. However, Draco knew better than to inquire where his lover got these. When he would ask he would get an affectionate nip on the ear, a wink, and a "I have my ways." He did appreciate them, though.   
  
For three months or so, the relationship went on like this. But Christmas break would soon be around the corner and Draco would be forced to go back to his abusive home. Harry, however, with the rest of the Weasley's and Hermione, was going back to the Burrow. These two things, irritated Draco to a point were he was taking his anger out on Harry. One night while they were sitting in the prefect's bath, not doing anything, Draco let his rage out.  
  
"You shouldn't go back there. I don't want you to." Harry said reference to his home for winter holidays, "If you stay here, I'll stay too."  
  
"I can't. Father would be suspicious."  
  
"Father can go to hell. Just stay here with me. A week without being with you is hard enough, but two weeks?"  
  
"Oh, go to hell, Harry!"  
  
"No thanks."   
  
"Piss off, then! Your fucking dad isn't Lucius Malfoy! Your god-damn father died didn't he? So how the bloody fuck would know what it's like to have a bloody father! Your father never had the chance to introduce you to drugs! You fucking wanker!" Draco grabbed a towel and stood up. Harry was speechless, so he continued, "You don't know the first bloody things about being a Malfoy or actually living! You have had people looking after you your whole god dammed life, haven't you, Perfect Potter! Everyone has to feel sorry for you because your fucking parents were killed and you have to live with filthy Muggles!" Draco stormed out, leaving a shocked Harry behind.  
  
Draco didn't know why he had exploded like that. But everything little thing got under his skin these days. He went to his private room in the Slytherin house, his father had paid a lot of money to get it for him. Draco hated sharing. He soon found himself shooting up and snorting so much that he passed out. His dreams were strange and frightening. He had images of him beating and raping a little boy that looked like him and enjoying it. He had images of him and Harry. But Harry wasn't Harry in these dreams. He was... someone who seemed oddly like his father. And others where Draco was his father, and he was whipping Harry. He dreamed of Lucius finding him holding Harry and screaming, "YOU FILTHY BLOODY FAG! YOU HAVE POISONED THE MALFOY NAME! YOU HAVE PUT YOUR MOTHER AND ME TO SHAME! GET UP, BOY! I'M SORRY THAT YOUR MY SON, YOU DISGUSTING WORM!" Then Draco awoke with a start. The scars on his back stung as if he really had been whipped. It was strange though, because when Draco got into the shower, he noticed that the scars on his back from many whips, were no longer scars... they were gashes. 


	6. Of Rings and Beatings

Chapter Six: Of Rings and Beatings  
  
Draco got off the Scarlet train and saw his mother. He hung his low and thought about the past few days. Harry hadn't really spoken to him. And that dream... He shivered. Every time he dreamed now, those damn scars were reopened. He vaguely wondered what his father would think of it. Then a thought appeared in Draco's head, Maybe my father was the one who put it there. Maybe he's doing this to me. Interesting. His mother held a portkey that would take them to Malfoy Manor. "Hello, Draco, dear." she said and smiled. He smiled back weakly and thought, At least she's not snockered.   
  
"How's your semester been?" Bloody fucking peachy.  
  
"It's been fine, Mum."  
  
"Oh, it's time dear." She held out the small purse. /i And Draco felt a tugging around his navel. Then he looked up at the huge Malfoy Manor. So big, impersonal. And full damn dark magic. Draco loathed it. But it was only two weeks. Of abuse. And drugs. And alcohol. And probably snogging his father against his will. Draco heaved a sigh and thought again, It's only two weeks.  
  
"Hello, Draco." came an ice cold voice from the kitchen, "Welcome home."  
  
Draco nodded to his father and started to walk away. "Not a word of greeting to your old man, boy?"  
  
At that, he turned around and said, "Hello, Father."  
  
"Much better. I knew I'd knock some manners into you one day." Lucius was just trying to make his son angry for an excuse to beat him. But his son was having none of it, as Draco just shook his and began to walk up the stairs to his room, dragging his trunk behind him. He began to unpack his trunk and at the very bottom of it was a roughly wrapped package. "What's this?" he mumbled aloud. He unfolded the piece of paper that was attached to it. It read,   
  
"Draco, the ring is for you. I put it at the bottom of your trunk because I thought you'd find it when you most needed to know that I love you. You unpacking probably means that your home and I know that desperately need someone loves you there, so if you ever need to know, just speak it aloud and the ring should glow. Love, Harry." Draco looked at the small piece of silver and nearly dropped the letter. It was so thoughtful. So simple. Draco slipped it on to his left hand ring finger. And he asked, "Does he still love me?" And the ring glowed. Draco's heart leapt and began beating furiously. He loves me. He loves me. He loves me! HE LOVES ME! He grabbed a quill and parchment and began to form a letter to his lover. But he couldn't get past "Dear Harry," He sighed and looked at the pictures of Harry and him that had been taken by none other himself.   
  
The first one had Harry planting a kiss on Draco's cheek. But he stopped at the one that showed them kissing passionately. The picture moved just the way Draco remembered it. He looked at the edge of the picture and smiled and saw his hand moving down to Harry's ass. At the moment, he heard his mother call him down to dinner. But Draco, not wanting to let go of the picture, put it in his pocket and came down. Dinner, as always was a solemn event. Draco ate his meal as fast as he could and asked to be excused. To his surprise, his father said, "No. Sit down." Draco hesitantly returned to his seat. His father looked at him and said, "I hear, from a very reliable source," iSnape/i ,"that your grades have been going down and have been seen gallivanting around late at night with a certain Gryffindor." he chose his last words carefully. Draco was positive he knew of the relationship but also positive that he didn't know of its nature. His hand went to his pocket to make sure he still had the picture. Unfortunately, his father noticed.  
  
"What's in your pocket, Draco?" his cold eyes narrowed dangerously.  
  
"Nothing. Just a quill."  
  
"Draco, go to your room. I'll be there in a minute."   
  
Draco went to his room. And was sure what was going to happen. How had Snape known about him and Harry? Was it all that obvious? Damn that stupid potions teacher! Fucking low life bastard! Working for my father! Damn! Draco's thoughts were interrupted by his door being opened.  
  
"Take off your shirt, boy!" Lucius demanded. And Draco did as he was told.  
  
"Good. It looks like my little spell worked." His father nodded approvingly as he looked at the gashes, "However it doesn't look as painful as it should have been. No matter, it's something I'll have to remedy." Draco looked in horror as his father made that statement and lovingly stroked his whip. He had been right. Everything else seemed like a blur because he was being flogged longer and harder than he had ever been in his life. But he got strength to continue through by watching his glowing ring. Then, he wasn't expecting his father to hit him over the head with a with the metal end of his whip and knocked him out. 


	7. Of Love and Fights

Chapter Seven: Of Love And Fights  
  
Harry felt sick. His lover had left him and insulted him. Hurt him in endless ways. He missed Draco. And still, he admitted disgusted with himself, loved him. But he understood what Draco was going through. And hoped that he had found his ring. For most of the year Harry has withdrawn himself from his friends. His thoughts of Draco never ended. He awoke late one night, sweating and to his surprise screaming. Ron was looking over him saying, "Harry! HARRY! Are you alright, mate?" Ron did look worried. "Yeah, I'm fine. What happened?"   
  
"You were kicking and screaming 'Don't hurt me! Stop!' and then you said 'I love him!'"   
  
"Oh my God."  
  
"Harry, are you seeing a guy?" Ron now was just curious. And Harry wanted to tell him but he wasn't sure how he'd react. Then he said, "Is that why you've not been talking to us as much? You're seeing a guy! Tell me who!" Harry could tell he was excited.  
  
"Alright, but don't freak out."  
  
"I won't Harry. Wait, it's not Percy is it?"  
  
"No, no. Not Percy."  
  
"Or Fred? Or George?"  
  
"No." It had become a guessing game and Harry was glad.  
  
"Seamus?"  
  
"No."  
  
"Dean? Neville?"  
  
"Cold!" Harry laughed and so did Ron.  
  
"Alright...um...Ernie? From Hufflepuff?"  
  
"Way off, mate!"  
  
"Okay, um...Terry Boot from Ravenclaw?"   
  
"No."  
  
"It's not," Ron's eyes widened, "...Malfoy is it?"  
  
Harry didn't say anything but stood up and got a drink of water. "It is!" Ron's jaw was still on the floor.   
  
"I didn't tell you for that reason, Ron."  
  
Ron looked offended, "What reason? I'm a little shocked but Hermione's suspected but I didn't know she was right, mate!"  
  
"You don't hate me?" Harry asked in disbelief.  
  
"No way, Harry! Your my best mate! And I've got something to tell you too." Ron's ears went red.   
  
Now it was Harry's turn to be excited, "What? I mean, who?"  
  
"Guess." Ron grinned.  
  
"Parvarti?" he shook his head.  
  
"Lavender?"  
  
"Nope."  
  
"Padma?"  
  
"No."  
  
"Um...Hermione?" Ron grinned even more and winked. Then Harry said, "Oh my god! You and Hermione! You dog! How long?"   
  
"A while. I've liked her forever though!" Both boys grinned and Harry has almost forgotten his fight with Draco as they talked about their lovers.  
  
In the meantime, Draco woke up on his bed, with no clothes. He wasn't sure what had happened but due to the stickiness on his ass, he had a pretty good idea. Then he looked for his pants to find his picture. But it wasn't in his pocket. He tore his entire room apart looking for a single one of his pictures.   
  
"Draco, don't. You won't find them." the voice of Lucius sounded irritated.  
  
"WHAT THE HELL DID YOU DO WITH THEM!" Draco shouted.  
  
"You can't be caught with those photos. You'll ruin the family name."  
  
Draco was silent.  
  
"And not to mention, you've disapointed me and your mother worse than you ever have in you miserable life, you little worm."  
  
"I am NOT a little worm!"  
  
"Yes, you are and you're a bloody fag!" Lucius was raising his voice then.  
  
"GO TO HELL! LIKE YOU AREN'T!"  
  
Then his mother walked across the room and disappeared. This angered Draco. So he shouted, "AND DON'T GET ME STARTED ON YOU, YOU BITCH! YOU LET HIM RAPE ME AND ABUSE ME EVERY NIGHT! YOUR NOT MY MOTHER! YOU'RE A COWARD!"  
  
"DON'T YOU SPEAK TO YOUR MOTHER THAT WAY, YOU LITTLE SHIT!"  
  
He hit Draco on the head and blood oozed down his face. "GO TO YOUR ROOM AND DO NOT COME OUT UNTIL YOU HAVE TO GO BACK TO THAT BLOODY SCHOOL OF YOURS!"  
  
Draco did not hesitate to obey his father. 


	8. Of Letters and Plans

Chapter Eight: Of Letters and Plans  
  
Draco woke up and his head was aching. He moved his hand to his face and felt the dried blood. Then everything that happened that evening came back to him. He tried to move but when he did pain seared through his whole body. He looked down and groaned when he saw the bruises on his stomach and chest. Why does he like to beat me when I'm unconcious? he wondered, somehwta incoherently while looking at his bruises. He could tell that a few of his ribs were cracked. He groaned again and once more, fell asleep. When he woke up the second he was more himself and coherent. "What day is it? What time is it" he muttered. Then looked at his calender. It crossed off the days itself. And it said, :December 25, Christmas, nine p.m." "Damn." Draco said. Five minutes later there was a taping on his window. Being to hurt to get it himself he called for his house-elf, Renny to open it. The snowl owl dropped a letter on his bed and perched on one of the posts. "He wants a letter back then?" Hedwig hooted softily and Draco took that for a yes. He knew this owl very well. He tore open the evenlope and read the letter.   
  
Dear Draco,  
  
I'm sorry about our last meeting. ("Why is he sorry?") I want to make sure that your all right. I've been, well, worried. Write me back as soon as you can. Love, Harry.  
  
Draco took the parchment, quill and pot of ink that Renny was handing him and wrote,  
  
Dear Harry,  
  
Don't be sorry about our last meeting. It was my fault. I'm sorry. I don't want you to be worried. Everything is fine here. How is your Christmas? Can't wait to see you at school. Love, Draco  
  
He kept re-reading the letter. It looked about right. He truly didn't want Harry worried about him. And telling the truth may cause his lover to take a drastic step that didn't need to be taken. Draco pulled the Malfoy ring off his finger and gave it and the letter to Hedwig, who gave a hoot of thanks and nip on Draco's finger and flew out the window.   
  
"It's been a long time since I had a hit." Draco said to Renny, who took the hint. And considering that Draco was too hurt to properly prepare the drug, the house-elf did it for him and even injected the sweet liquid into his vein. Draco's achings were eased as he ordered the elf to give him another hit, once the effect of the first wore off. Things seemed to be looking up, but of course, that may have been the heroin talking.  
  
Hedwig reached Harry at about 9:30 in the morning. Harry's eyes went slowly over the letter. He knew Draco was lying. He could feel his lover's pain just by touching the parchment. He looked at Hedwig, who hadn't left. She dropped something small and circular in his hands nipped his ear and left. "Wow." Harry whispered. It was Draco's ring. He put it on his finger and started to get dressed. He had to tell someone. Draco was being abused and was lying about it now. He couldn't let his lover be in so much pain. Harry ran quickly through the Common Room, ignoring Seamus' offer of wizard's chess. And he was in front of Dumbledore's office. "Chocolate frog!" he said and the gargoyle jumped aside. "Professor!" he knocked on the door. "Come in, Harry." came Dumbledore's reply. "Professor! Draco Malfoy's in trouble!" he said when he was in the door.  
  
"Is he?" he raised his silvery eyebrows.  
  
"Yes! He's being abused but doesn't want any to know! He went home for the holidays and...he's in pain! Professor, you have to do something!"  
  
"Harry, I am afraid that I can't interfere." Dumbledore sounded grave.  
  
"But WHY!?"   
  
"Because Draco doesn't want anyone to know. He went home willingly."  
  
"He went home because his dad would be suspicious!" Hary said hotly.  
  
"But he still went."  
  
"He wants it to end. He's told me so!"  
  
"Then he has to come to me."  
  
Harry growled in frustration and wandered the corridors. "God!" he muttered to himself. "How could he do nothing?! The only thing nessercary for the triumph of evil is for good men to do nothing!" he shouted. No one was in this corridor. Where was he? "Oh, God. Draco..." Then a plan came to him. He ran to Gryffindor Common Room and up the stairs to his dormitory. It's breaking so many school rules...he thought. And not to mention Ministry rules. But I don't care. It's for Draco. My love. The only thing that gives my life meaning!  
  
He ran outside to the grounds. Then a thought struck him. "I don't know where MAlfoy Manor is..." He held his Firebolt in his hand and ran to Owlery. "Hedwig knows! I'll take her!" He slid on owl droppings as he ran to where his snowy owl was. "Hedwig! I need you to show me the way to Malfoy Manor!" Hedwig hooted. They reached the grounds and Harry kicked off following Hedwig. 


	9. The Monster and The Prisoner

Chapter Nine: The Monster and the Prisoner  
  
Draco woke up again, for the fiftieth time that day. His father was in the room, lingering in the doorway. "Draco..." he said. His voice sounded oddly compassionate and it scared Draco. His father was *never* compassionate. He moved forward, towards the naked boy on the bed. Draco cowered and Lucius stopped. "Please don't be afraid." he said, softly. But this only made Draco more frightened. This couldn't be his father... it was impossible. He stood still, afraid to move. Something was wrong. And then it clicked...  
  
"Mother?! What are you doing?!" he asked. "Shhh!" she said. It was his mother. "How...?" he started and his mother said, "Polyjuice Potion. I'm getting you out of here. And only your father can leave this house. This is the only way."  
  
"Even after what I said to you?" he asked. She nodded. "Draco, you're my son. I--" her face twisted in pain and she fell to the floor. Draco looked up, even more frightened to see his real father there. "Draco, I'm disappointed." his voice was cold and cruel. This really was his father. "In you and her." he rubbed his temple.   
  
"No, you're not father." Draco said. He suddenly realised what it took to survive. Just like that U2 song, you become a monster so the monster will not break you. "Don't back talk me boy!" he spat.  
  
"Father, I'm not back talking you. I want to be like you." Draco pushed back all of his feelings. They didn't matter anymore. What mattered was survival. Lucius raised an eyebrow. "Do you? Well, Draco, perhaps you are finally owning up to your name."  
  
"What can I do?" Draco asked. He had to prove himself to make his father believe him. Lucius raised his eyebrows so high that they were in danger of disappearing in his hair. They heard a clink on the roof and hooting owl. Lucius Malfoy smiled, evilly.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
Harry landed on the roof and Hedwig hooted. He pet her, softly and she flew away. "Now, if I could just find Draco's room..." Harry said as he surveyed the huge manor. There were so many towers and rooms and wings it looked impossible. He flew to an open window and climbed in. He ran his fingers over his ring, hoping that it would lead him to Draco. And he felt a tug, pulling him to the West. He followed that, sure that it would lead him to his lover.   
  
He had to be careful though. The Manor was crawling with house-elves and Harry could have sworn lots of Dark Magic. But luckily, there many things to hide behind if a house-elf walked by and he had his wand out if something tried to kill him. He came to a door and could hear voices.  
  
"Wormtail!" Harry's heart skipped a beat. Why was Voldemort in Malfoy Manor? Of course, Harry thought, Draco's father! And he couldn't miss a chance to knock off Voldemort, so Harry queitly opened the door...  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
Draco stood and waited. Harry would be coming soon. He felt like a burden had been lifted off of his shoulders. He had accepted who and what he was. A monster. But that didn't matter. He wasn't being someone he wasn't. His and his father's was simple. Harry was no doubt coming to rescue Draco. He would try to find his room. But if all went well, Harry would hear the voice of Voldemort, magicked there, and try to play the hero, yet again. Draco was to torture him.  
  
He heard heavy breathing out side the door. Then "Wormtail!". It was working. The door opened and light was cast into the dark room. Harry stepped in with his wand out and Draco said, "Expelliarmous!" His wand soared into his hand. His father stood in the corner, across from a biwildered looking Harry. "What--" he began but Lucius closed the door and nodded.  
  
"Harry." Draco said, sounding exactly like his father. "So good of you to join us." Cold and cruel. Harry was even more dumbfounded. He couldn't speak.  
  
"What? Cat got your tongue?" he laughed cruelly and Lucius looked at him, approvingly.   
  
"You're...you're not Draco Malfoy." Harry said. He felt naked without his wand.  
  
"Oh but I am." Draco replied and moved towards him. "I am." He kissed him, hard and forceful. "Can't you tell!?" Draco threw him to the floor and magicked his shirt off. Harry's glasses broke and cut the skin around his eyes with he fall. Blood blurred his vision. Draco's wand became a whip and he asked, "Do you know pain, Harry Potter?" He raised the whip. "You will now!" He let the whip fall on Harry's back, again and again. It cut him. It put long huge gashes in his skin. Draco got the feeling of deja vu and remembered his dream. It all made sense now.  
  
Harry was shocked and appalled by his lover. Or rather, his ex-lover now. He was vaguely aware of Lucius Apparating out of the room with a few words to his son. When Draco raised the whip for a long and harder beating Harry quickly turned over and kicked his legs, causing him to fall. He had come to his senses and he had to get out fo there before he died. He heard Draco groan and then snarl with rage. He ran to the door but it was locked. He was trapped. 


	10. Of Fistfights and Last Words

Chapter Ten: Of Fistfights and Last Words  
  
"Stop this! Draco, why?!" Hary shouted as the other boy lunged for him. "Because this is who I am, Potter!" Draco snarled at him. Harry ran to the corner of the room but Draco was faster and grabbed him.  
  
"You're hurting me!" Harry shouted as his back stung with searing pain.   
  
"Too bad!" Draco answered, "If you don't like being hurt then please don't stay. No one asked you to come!" He seemed to find the entire situation rather sadistically funny. "Get out if you can, Potter!" He laughed.  
  
Harry turned around and slapped him then ran into the shadows. He heard Draco snarl again, all his laughter gone. It had been replaced with rage.  
  
"Crucio!" he shouted and he heard Harry scream. "Perfect." he said as he moved forward. Harry felt like he was on fire. He had felt this way before. But now he was horrified at the person who had cast it on him. He twisted on the floor and his hand reached out and grabbed something...something long and wooden. His wand!   
  
Draco took the curse off and smiled. But he wasn't prepared for what was about to hit him.  
  
"Expelliarmous! Avento--" He was cut off by Draco hitting him in the head with a vase. He lay on the floor... his head hurt but he wouldn't allowm himself to pass out. He couldn't. He felt dizzy and heard cruel laughter. That snapped him back to reality as he stood up.  
  
"You're riduculus, you know that Potter?" Draco sneered and laughed again. Harry swayed, clutching the wall for support. "Did you really think you could cast *that* spell on me? Ha! I'm smarter, quicker and much more skilled." He grinned, wickedly.  
  
"Momentus Paralius!" he shouted and Harry found that he could not move. He could hear and think but his body was like a statue.  
  
"Don't bothering trying, you can't." Draco said. "Yes, this funny little spell is considered Dark Magick. Holds you in place, you see." He laughed. "Oh, Potter. I really did want things to turn out good for you. Oh well." He raised his wand and Harry felt life coming back to him. He could move. "Ava--" Harry cut Draco off by snatching his wand, throwing it far from them and tackling him to the ground. Draco was caught off gaurd and didn't quite realized what was going on until he was underneath Harry.  
  
"Potter!" he growled and spat on him. Harry held him down and then punched him, hard. Draco fought and struggled with his legs and the two were fist fighting each other. Harry grabbed the collar of Draco's shirt and bashed his head against the wall.   
  
Draco was bruised and bleeding but he kicked Harry in the groin and punched him in the stomach. "Damn you!" he whispered. Harry doubled over in pain, taking huge gasps of air. The other boy fell over on the ground, too weak to stay standing.  
  
Harry crawled over to Draco. "Hey?" he whispered.   
  
"Fuck you, Potter!" Draco said.  
  
"Shut up, Malfoy!" Harry retorted, lamely.   
  
"I didn't...think that you..." he gulped for breath, "...had the guts...to kill anyone, Potty!" He really was dying.   
  
"Fuck off, Malfoy. You think I meant to? Or even wanted to?" he said, vicously.  
  
"Still, you're..." blood poured out his mouth, "Leave...this...place..." he said, his last words before he died. Harry looked down at him and hated himself for what he did. Even though Draco would have done it to him in a second, he still felt remorseful. He pulled the Malfoy ring off his finger and, even though he was too young to Apparate, he had to leave somehow. He concentrated on Hogwarts and a new life. He left Draco behind when he did.  
  
He didn't stay.  
  
~End~ 


End file.
